Dating Etiquette: How to Navigate the First Date
Follow these modern-chivalry dating tips to give her a gentlemen's impression she'll never forget
By Esquire
Illustration: Ross MacDonald
Updated: May 22, 2009
The
first date can be a disaster if you do it wrong. From
the predate to the follow-up, keep in mind this six-step dating guide
on how to do it right.
1. The Predate- Dress
for the occasion, but more important, dress to show respect. Reminder:
It's still better to overdress.
- Easy on
the cologne. Avoid novelty ties. Arm yourself with the tools
of modern chivalry.
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2. The Pickup- Be on time.
- Go to the door.
- Do
not bring flowers -- it's outdated. You may, however, bring a small,
thoughtful gift that you did not purchase from Wicks 'n' Sticks or B.
Dalton Bookseller.
3. The Drive- If you're taking a cab, you should open the door for her, give the directions, and pay.
- While amusing, avoid that bit where you go and then stop and pretend to drive away without her.
- No music -- try talking.
- If
you find the ensuing silence unbearable, you may put on music, but
avoid the following: a) talk radio; b) anything in which R. Kelly
describes something overtly about intimacy; c) playlists consisting
entirely of songs that feature her name.
4. The Restaurant- Open the door for her. In case of revolving doors, you go first.
- Wait
until she's seated to take your seat. At fancier joints, it's the
waiter's job to help her with her chair, not yours.
- Never
order for her. And never present a coupon to the waiter while saying,
"And the lady will have something of equal or lesser
value."
- Sharing food: If she suggests it, you're doing it.
- Pay.
If she offers to help, say something sincere like, "It's my pleasure,"
not something you think is witty, like, "I'll consider this a down
payment for later, if you know what I mean!"
5. The Walk- Walk at her pace.
- Tradition
dictates that you should walk on the outside of her to avoid puddle
splashes and runaway carriages, but feel free to disregard this unless
your date takes place in Colonial Williamsburg (not
advised).
- Offer her your arm. It's chivalrous and also a good way to initiate contact.
- Be a man. Make your move. May God be with you.
- You're not going inside. Unless she suggests it.
6. Following Up- No texting. Call the next day. Two days, tops.
- If she answers the phone, thank her for a great night and schedule a second date.
- If you get voice mail, thank her and ask her to call you back.
- If she answers the phone "Sam's Pizza" and pretends you've got the wrong number, all bets are off.
Reprinted with permission of Hearst Communications, Inc.
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