Here's a dating mystery we're dying to crack: Why is it that even when we guys open up and clue a girl in to our thoughts and experiences, you ladies insist on pushing for more and more intimate info? It's hard for us to relate to your wanting to know everything about us, because even the most love-bitten man doesn't feel the need to be in on every detail about his girl. In fact, certain topics are actually major turnoffs and produce the same skin-crawling effect as hearing fingernails raked across a blackboard. So unless you want your man to secretly wish you came with a mute button, save the following taboo topics for your girlfriends, your mom or your therapist... just not your guy.

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"Whenever my girlfriend gets control of the remote, she switches to a gossip channel and goes on about how lucky Cameron Diaz is or how Drew Barrymore lost 10 pounds. Geez, get a freaking life!" -- Paul, 27

"My ex-girlfriend was obsessed with Brad Pitt. She knew more about his life than Angelina Jolie does. Whenever he had a movie coming out, I never heard the end of it. I felt like I was dating a stalker, not to mention the fact that it didn't do wonders for my ego. Brad isn't exactly the worst-looking guy in the world." -- Donald, 26

"I met this really gorgeous British woman at a bookstore, so I invited her to have coffee with me. When I got back to the table with our drinks, she was sitting there with a pile of foreign gossip rags in front of her. Before I knew what hit me, she was talking my ear off about Prince Charles and a bunch of other royals I didn't know and couldn't care less about. I was absolutely bored out of my mind. Well, so much for the theory that smart women hang out in bookstores." -- Andrew, 25

"I took my old girlfriend to a cute bed-and-breakfast for the weekend, and all she could talk about was how her previous boyfriend had taken her to Paris for a long weekend. Whatever happened to thank you? No wonder we both dumped her." -- Ben, 28

"My girlfriend and I were having brunch one Sunday when we ran into her ex-boyfriend. After he left, she started telling me all about some cross-country trip they took when they were in college. I know there's nothing going on between them, but that doesn't mean I want to hear about the good old days. She should save the reminiscing for her girlfriends." -- Lewis, 27

"My girl asked me to help her put together some do-it-yourself furniture that she'd bought, and I was a total disaster. That's when she went on and on about how good her ex was with tools. The story I enjoyed most was about how he built her a special magazine rack... which, of course, she still has. Now every time I see that thing, I want to break it. I admitted I am no good at this kind of fix-it stuff, so I don't know why she felt the need to rub it in by telling me her ex was the second coming of Bob Vila." -- Ray, 30

"First it was the grapefruit diet. Then it was Jenny Craig. Now it's the Fatkins thing. My girlfriend tries a new diet about once a month, and she explains how she's convinced that this is the one that's going to help her lose weight. I always remind her that the reason I asked her out in the first place is because I think she's beautiful. I wouldn't be attracted to her if she looked like a string bean." -- Derek, 29

"I can never do anything spontaneous with my girl because she won't leave the house unless she looks perfect. It takes longer for her to get ready for dinner than it does for us to actually go out and eat it. First she asks if I like her outfit. Next she asks how her makeup looks. Then she drops the fun-crusher on me: 'Do I look fat?' I get so aggravated. Don't ask for my opinion if you don't want it. By the time she's ready to leave, the evening is already ruined because I'm in such a pissed-off mood." -- Andy, 33

"My old girlfriend would gush about how romantic it was that her roommate's boyfriend got down on one knee when he proposed to her. Then she'd tell me every freakin' detail about the wedding plans, from the dress to the cake to the invitations. I didn't really know these people, and I hate hearing about mushy stuff anyway, especially if it has nothing to do with me. I just tuned it all out." -- Steve, 36

"My girlfriend never stops talking about how great her sister's life is. I'm so tired of hearing about her perfect brother-in-law and her two adorable nephews. It's so obvious that she's using the conversation as a steppingstone to talk about when we're going to get married." -- Rob, 36

"My girlfriend loves telling me about how her best friend treats her boyfriend like a pile of garbage, flirting with other guys when he isn't around and spending hours on her laptop to email her exes. I don't want to know the nitty-gritty, because then I feel awkward when I'm around him. Besides, it makes me wonder if my girl is bad-mouthing me behind my back." -- Will, 25

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