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Cosmopolitan
Dating 101: How to Be a Total Man-Magnet

A girl who got paid to help guys meet women shares her insights into what motivates men to make a move.

By Christie Griffin for Cosmopolitan Updated: May 22, 2009
woman flirting with single men
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Do you ever go out sometimes and feel like guys aren't giving you the attention you deserve, and you can't figure out why? That used to happen to me too. Then I became a part-time "wingwoman" -- a girl who helps guys meet chicks by posing as the guys' platonic female friend. (Wingwoman services are available in many cities, including New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, Dallas, Miami, and St. Louis.)
While earning my wings, I learned lots of little tricks every single girl can use to improve her dating success with guys. Warning: Once you perfect these moves, you might find that you're such a powerful man-magnet, you attract guys everywhere. I used to date a guy who asked me out at the ATM!
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Dating tip #1: Go out in groups of no bigger than three. Larger groups of girls are supertough (read: intimidating) to approach. Three is a good number because your two friends can keep each other company when a guy walks up to chat with you.
Dating tip #3: Smile genuinely. So obvious, right? But I can't stress it enough -- and I can't believe I ever acted aloof in an attempt to seem more cool. Now I know that women smile all the time naturally (when we're nervous, when we're trying to be polite, etc.), so if you don't do it at all, you look unapproachable.
Dating tip #4: Work the eye contact. To reel him in from across the room, tilt your chin down a bit and flash him a couple of sultry glances. (Guys love it when you look up at them -- it makes them feel manly.) If the guy across the room is so gorgeous you have a hard time looking straight at him and are simply too nervous, fake it by focusing on the tiny area right between his eyes. He won't be able to tell the difference.
Dating tip #5: Don't immediately ask him what he does. Some men think all women are gold diggers. A lot of my clients hated being asked what their job is. It's that fear-of-being-used thing again.
Dating tip #6: Make positive small talk. Once I started studying other women, I couldn't believe how negative some of us appear. When you're out on the town, you're supposed to be having fun, and any complaint ("It's hot in here!"), pessimism ("There will definitely be another terrorist attack"), or snarky quip ("Look at that chick's belt -- so 2002!") pretty much pokes a hole in the fun-girl aura you should be projecting. Some better small-talk topics: recent vacations, favorite bands, hilarious movies. You can hit him with your deep, dark world-view some other time.
Reprinted with permission of Hearst Communications, Inc.
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