very good advice

Due to death, I have been single for almost 2 years now. Was married once before for 22 years that ended in divorce. Second marriage lasted 11 years before death. Has been a real learning experience. Many things have changed. It seems that money is the main motive for relationship instead of friendship anymore. Maybe I am too old fashioned for this dating stuff, but it has been real disappointing. Online dating has been even worse. Only responses I have received has been from scammers. Overall I am not that big of a hurry to be married again. I love talking to women just to be talking to them and building a friendship, which is very important. Without that, it wouldn't be much of a relationship. I am sure that things will get better as time goes by, so I will just take my time and try to relax with the whole situation.

I agree that there are no set in stone rules here, and that sometimes the grieving is done during the marriage or relationship; however, many experts agree that 1 year of waiting/healing time for every four years of marriage is a good rule of thumb.

Sometimes I find myself rebounding into a new relationship to help cover up the hurt and pain of my previous relationship. While it may seem to temporarily quench my fear of being alone, it is usually a way to avoid the pain. It is also unfair to my new partner since they are there to satisfy my one self fish need of avoidance. With the fear of being hrt by another still in my mouth I usually distance myself from my new partner when I feel they are getting to close. That still familar fear of being hurt is still there and I retreat away. The cycle will continue unless I choose to break it myself through honesty and self awareness.

There are no rules. However, people expect one not to jump into another relationship "too soon" after the end of one. What is too soon? Everyone is different. Life is too short and men especially were not meant to be alone. The problem is that most people, men and women are so shallow and phoney that it is hard to see though them in a normal situation, much less the vulnerable state you are in when you are trying to get over your last loss of any nature including the death of a spouse.

I lost my boyfriend to cancer last Sept...... How soon? I do not know, I just know I am lonely.....

I think a lot of it depends on how the marriage ended. If it was unexpected because of distrust or an affair then it would take longer I think to heal and be healthy enough to date again. But if both persons are open and communicated the reasons why the marriage is failing then I think the grieving process would be less. Just my opinion.

I think a lot of it depedes on how the marriage ended . If it was unexpeceted bcause of distrust or an affair then it would take longer I think to heal and be healthy enough to date again . But if both persons are open and communicated the reasons why the marriage is failing then I think the grieving prosses would be less. Just my opinion.

You have to remember that life is short, so any day you get is a good day. Some, are certainly better than others. Days when there's love in your life gets A's for sure, but don't fall apart if the day only gets a B. Admittedly, being terminally single does take the fine edge off, but this is real life and it ain't never gonna' be perfect. Having said that, I've been single way too long, so say a prayer to the gods of true love on my behalf...and I'll do it for you! Keep trying....Who dares, wins!

I think that dating and socializing should start right away. Being alone is not good. The bigger question is are you ready to see your ex date. That hurts almost as much as lonlieness. But, you need to live your life. If your not living, your...